Monday, January 16, 2012

Shirtless Adventures In Mystery Land: Part 5

Because River reminded me I hadn't worked on this in a while.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
The mermaid's tail turned into a pair of legs. Really nice legs, Joshua noticed, as she stood, stretching nakedly, before walking over to an alcove near the back of the cave.

She came back to the pond carrying a large, shiny sword. Joshua felt slightly panicy seeing it. Was she going to kill him? What did mermaids eat anyway? Before he could get too carried away with his own thoughts, the mermaid nakedly offered him the sword.

"You'll be needing this on your journey," she said. "The key to your castle has been taken by a nasty tribe of Brownies."

"...little chocolate cake things have my key?" Joshua asked hestitantly.

The mermaid laughed at his question. "Brownies are a type of faerie, somewhat related to goblins. Ususally they're nice, helping people with harvests and housework. This tribe has gone bad, we don't know why. Don't lose the sword Joshua, you'll need it."

Joshua sighed nakedly as he weighted the sword in his hands. It was a good fit. Well balanced, felt like it would be easy to swing and stab. He'd just prefer not to have to use it.

"Good luck Joshua." The mermaid smiled, leaned forward, and kissed Joshua softly. There was a flash of sparkly light, and suddenly Joshua found himself standing shirlessly in a forest, holding his sword. (Not a metaphor).

He was a tiny bit disappointed, as he'd kind of been wondering what mermaid sex might be like. As long as her legs stayed legs of course. Joshua shrugged shirtlessly, adjusted his messenger bag so it was sitting more comfortably and headed off through the forest.

Nearing the edge of the forest, Joshua shirtlessly came across a stream with a huge waterfall. Pausing to stare at the breathtaking image, he decided this would be a good place to take a break and eat lunch. Shirtlessly setting down his bag, he was knocked off his feet by a small, slender man with very sharp teeth. The small man sat on Joshua's shirtless chest, biting his flailing arm.

Realising this must be one of the Brownies he was meant to find, Joshua heaved himself upward, forcing the man away. Five more Brownies rushed at him, trying to knock him down, biting him anywhere they could.
Joshua scrabbled for his messenger bag, managing to snag it, and retrieve his sword. Backing away from the rabid-seeming creatures, he swung the sword menacingly.

"I don't want to hurt you," he shirtlessly tried to explain, "I just need my key. If you give it to me, I'll leave you in peace."

The Brownies ignored this, snarling and advancing on him, looking to attack. Reluctantly he stabbed at the nearest one, spearing him in the chest.  As it fell to the ground, the five remaining Brownies shrieked and leaped on him, biting and scratching. Joshua fought back stabbing and swinging the sword.

Finally Joshua stood, shirtless, wounded and bleeding, surrounded by the bodies of the dead Brownies. He turned away, horrified by what he'd just done. What he'd had to do. Joshua walked down to the waterfall, standing shirtlessly under the cascading water, washing off the blood. He stayed there long after he was clean, until he felt he could face the bodies again.

Joshua shirtlessly searched the Brownies until he found a large iron key hidden in the clothing of the first Brownie to attack him. It warmed in his hand and seemed to be pointing him in the direction he needed to go to find his castle.

Joshua started walking.
Hopefully this time it won't be a five-month wait before the next part.


Windsmoke. said...

Have i been waiting that long for Pt 5, bring on Pt 6 asap :-).

River said...

Clearly those Brownies weren't baked long enough....their brains were still oozing.